THE UNFATHOMABLE CONCEPT OF GIVING (Reprise)

Just like Christmas it is present time again.

giving

In 3 days time Charm will be 40 so Proton is writing out her card and is about to put in the obligatory £10 note. She always gives her children money on their birthdays, £10 to Quark for a bag of smack even though his debts to her run in to the thousands, £10 to Strangeness for a bottle of rum or some dope. So why should Charm be any different? Well for one, she is the only child who gives presents, so why should she not receive a nice surprise for once? But this is difficult for Proton, it would involve thinking of others and selecting something appropriate. This she is unable to do, money is far easier.

“Why don’t you send her a present ?”, asks Electron.

“No, I’m sure she’d prefer money.”

“What for? Dope?”

“Not necessarily, she could use it towards anything.”

“But she won’t. Its her fortieth, why not get her a present? For the same price you could get her the second series of that programme she likes, on DVD.”

“Do you think she’d like it?”

“Well, she loved the first series.”

“But she will be expecting money”

“Only because that is what you give her every year, GET HER A PRESENT”.

 

Electron is dispatched to order the present online.

This process being new to Proton, she begins to suggest other items to order (as recommended by the vendor).

“No, just this will be fine, anything else will only detract from the item chosen especially for her.”

The present is purchased.

Later that evening Proton says;

“I’m pleased I got Charm that present”.

“Good.”

“But she would have liked the money.”

“What for? Dope?”

“Not necessarily, she could have put it towards anything.”

“But she wouldn’t.”

“Glad, I got the present.”

 

The definition of a vicious circle.

 

P.S. Charm phoned on the morning of her birthday. She loved the present!