Coo Ker. Ka BOOM!

16 Feb

coo ker boomMonday night and electron is alone in his shed watching football on TV.
10:30 p.m. the phone rings. it is Proton .
“My cooker just exploded!”
“What do you mean?”
“The oven it just went bang. Really loudly. Quark came rushing down expecting to see me splattered all over the kitchen.”
“God! Are you okay?”
“Yeah a bit shaken up but…. ”
“So what are you going to do to eat ?”
“Quark will do something in the microwave for me.”

Tuesday at work Electron gets a phone call from Proton. She sounds terrible.
“Will you be coming in tonight after work? I really need to see you.”
“Yeah sure, What’s up?”
“I don’t feel very well.”
“Did Quark cook for you?”
“No, he went out last night. I waited up but he didn’t come back.”
Of course he didn’t, it was drug money Monday.
“So what have you eaten?”
“Just two bowls of cereal in the last 24 hours.”
(Proton does not know how to work the microwave.)
Electron returns from work to find Proton very shaky and anxious. She seems to have difficulty breathing.
There is no sign of Quark and Strangeness has gone to the country again.
“You’re coming to the shed,” he says.
The oven is made safe, the electrical sockets are covered over to ensure that neither of the “boys” uses the oven or cooker. Dire warning messages are written in bold felt tip to emphasise the danger.

(If you don’t believe an electric oven can explode, let me assure you. It CAN.)

The pair retire to the shed.
As the evening draws on Protons breathing becomes more and more erratic.
Unsure of the cause, did she inhale some toxic smoke or is this an extreme anxiety attack. Electron does not know whether to;
(a) Call an ambulance.
(b) Take proton to the hospital or…
(c) ..what to do.

He settles for trying to calm her down Gently stroking her for the entire night in an attempt to get her breathing under control.
Eventually daylight arrives – only 4 more hours until Protons doctors appointment.

The doctor detects some crackling in Protons lung and she is prescribed an inhaler and told to rest.
As the day wears on Electron himself because to feel unwell. It seems Proton may have contracted a cold and she’s given it to him.

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